Christopher ([info]makkura) wrote,
@ 2008-09-12 09:08:00
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Current music:Nine Inch Nails - Burn

17

God damnit, Emily...

Tonight, she tells me she thinks it's time I start visiting a therapist. Again. This comes at the same time that for the first time in years I've quietly thought to myself "hmm... maybe it's time I get put back on some pills..." You know. For balance.

The hilarious bit about that is that I haven't really spoken to her in a number of weeks, and she's formed this (admittedly, accurate) opinion based solely on my Tweets. She's a smart woman. And knows me.... so... damn... well.

My eye has been super aggitated all week long. Watery, and itchy, and bleh. All week long its been like this, but tonight has been the worst. I just spent about an hour and half driving around to different pharmacies around the area. Grocery stores that are still open, or a CVS. Even a 24 hour WalMart. Nothing was open. Yeah -- the 24 hour WalMart was closed. I'm a mess.

I just want to spend the weekend in my bed... and at the rate things are going, I just may end up doing that.

Goodnight Moon.

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[info]vanessavictoria
2008-09-12 04:12 pm UTC (link)
Maybe you're just stuck in a rut. It happens. Hell, that's where I've been since the beginning of this year. Sometimes I have fairly good days... but eventually, I'm back to feeling sad and confused about my life. Perhaps it's time for some new change in your life. What is it that you're unhappy with? Try doing some new things... ever gone to a shooting range? That's pretty fun. :)

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[info]makkura
2008-09-13 07:01 pm UTC (link)
Shooting range, huh? lol, i dont think I've ever thought of that. :)

I've thought it was a rut for a couple months now, but it just seems to feel... deeper than a rut. Good days and bad days, and all that.

I'm all for a big change. I'd love to just drop everything and vacation somewhere, but those kind of drastic measures take.... money. Which I don't got.

And hey!! I miss your posts! :)

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[info]vanessavictoria
2008-09-14 06:30 am UTC (link)
Yeah... I went a few months ago, and boy was it exciting. I proudly hung my target up in the closet when I got home! So now if anybody goes snooping in my closet they know not to mess with me!! haha. ^_^

Have you ever been in an isolation tank? I've been interested in trying it out myself... and if I have enough money (damn money!) saved up, I might try it out when I'm in Austin next week. I think a little meditation might do me some good.

I totally understand the money thing. I can hardly believe you have to pay as much rent as you do. Back when I was living in these apartments in Clovis... the rent was like $720. I split it with my roommate, but still, that payment alone was my paycheck. @_@ It's so expensive to live in California.

Hopefully I'll have something cool to write about when I get back from Austin. In the meantime, I'm going to continue to just check my friend's page multiple times throughout the day.

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[info]tail_eats_cat
2008-09-12 06:45 pm UTC (link)
You better have gone to the doctor today, Christopher.

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[info]lceruleanl
2008-09-12 10:32 pm UTC (link)
Glad to hear someone else agrees with me! =P Miss you guys, wish California was closer.

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[info]makkura
2008-09-13 07:03 pm UTC (link)
lol, yeah yeah. when she suggested that, one of my first thoughts was "oh li-ling is just gonna eat this up." :)

miss you too, yo. we'll party it up for sure when you get back. :)

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[info]lceruleanl
2008-09-13 07:38 pm UTC (link)
Ask around for referrals or something, that way you won't get stuck with traumatizing/scarring therapist who has shit for brains. There are, sadly, many out there. Sometimes you can call insurance companies and make specific requests when they search through their providers.

DISNEYLAND!!!!!! XD I miss it so.

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